Josh woke up yesterday morning and I wasn't in bed next to him. He figured that maybe I had fallen asleep downstairs watching a movie. However, when he walked back into the room he saw me asleep on the floor and then worried that he was in trouble.
In actuality, I walked in to the room the night before after Josh had gone to bed and looked at Pike's face and he looked so sad. I realized that we have been so busy with the new house and fixing things and working and taking care of my sister's little dog that we are babysitting that he has been a little neglected. (yes he is totally spoiled) I promptly got my pillow and a blanket and laid down on the floor next to his bed so he would know we still love him. He snuggled up next to me and we slept there all night.
Josh has decided that I can't say that I would be a bad mom.
I am a sucker for a sad face
Nameless
Honesty and Real Life
I tend to not write on here often because I assume no one wants to hear the mundane, frustrating, normal goings on of my life but today I need a space to write my feelings of late and I decided that maybe cyberspace was that space. I can't offend or disappoint cyberspace, and it can't decide to end our association or say that I talk too much, so dear cyberspace this is for you. (and to anyone actually reading this isn't a rainbows and sunshine post, just real life and real feelings so i won't be offended if you aren't interested-maybe one day I will make a personal blog for my personal thoughts but tonight this is what I have to work with)
Being married is hard. Sometimes my husband and I fight, sometimes he makes me crazy and I him. The last two years of our lives have been hell. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore my husband but I have had severe depression since we got married (kicked over the edge by going on birth control before we got married). It is literally miraculous that I am alive, I have had a lot of days full of suicide plans. I have spent months of my life curled in a ball on my couch not moving for hours on end. I have gained too much weight- due to the sitting on the couch for months. And now struggle to lose it as I start to regain control of my mind. My husband is amazing and has stood by me through all of this and loved me. Only recently have his own struggles come to light and presented me the opportunity to stand by him and love him as he fights his own demons. It is very hard thing but it made me realize that he is a wonderful man and we are blessed to be together, no one else could stand either of us.
We bought a house- it is an amazing house and everyday I am stressed about being able to afford it. It isn't expensive or elaborate and needs a ton of work done but I still worry.
Everyone around is having babies or has babies. I don't want a baby, which is pretty much a mortal sin being a member of a church that values so highly motherhood and families but I like my dogs. I don't trust myself to be a mom. So congrats to everyone else and please do the very best to let your children know everyday how much you love them and want them. I will leave the momming to you who are brave enough to do it. (This thought makes Josh sad. He would like to have kids one day but I would be happy to always just have my boxer babies.)
My "little" (he is 16 and 6 ft tall) brother is living with us. He really likes it here, that makes my heart happy. But I worry that we are not good enough to have him here. We don't go to church enough, we don't pray enough, we swear too much, and are too critical and judgemental. I hope that we can be better so he can become a good man. Maybe that is why I like dogs, I can't emotionally or mentally damage them.
Dear Cyberspace, thanks for listening. My heart is a little lighter which is saying a lot these days.
Morgan
New Addition Coming Soon!
8 beautiful pure bred boxer pups were born on May 17th
4 male and 4 female
all fawn coloring (golden brown just like Pike)
Look how tiny they are! The funny thing is we can believe how big they have gotten in just 2 weeks. They have literally tripled in size!
So about that new addition...
nope still not us having a baby, but we are keeping a puppy!
Isn't he ADORABLE!
This is a test of the cell phone blogging system...beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.....this has been a test
Come One Come All!
I know I am terrible at blogging because I am pretty sure most people just don't care that much about the goings on of our life. Also, the thought of trying to recap everything I haven't written about is too daunting so if you are really that interested you probably already know or you can ask.
Moving on.....
I am writing to announce that one week from Sunday on April 25th at 4pm there will be a choral performance like none other in the history of Pocatello. The ISU Women's Choir will be performing Stabat Mater by Giovani Pergolesi in its entirety. Unless you are a voice major you probably have no clue what I am talking about (I had never heard of it until last fall) so I will give you a brief introduction.
Stabat Mater is translated from Latin as "Sorrowful Mother" the entire work is based on the feelings, sorrows and love of Mary as she watched her Son be hung on the cross for the sins of his people. Although each of the 13 movements are in Latin (a poetic translation will be provided) the story is passionate and beautiful and expresses the sorrows only a mother could know while grieving over her first born.
Permission is granted to copy, distribute and/or modify this document under the terms of the GNU Free Documentation License,
Along with my choir I have been working on this piece since September and have truly come to love it and appreciate the message it conveys. So here I am inviting everyone who is in the Pocatello (Idaho Falls, Salt Lake, etc) area to come to this wonderful (FREE!!!!) concert at 4pm Sunday April 25th at the Congregational Church. We have worked really hard (and are REALLY good).
If you aren't there you will truly be missing out.
P.S. I am one of the 5 soloists! It will be awesome! And it is only about 45 minutes long so well worth your time.
P.P.S. if you want to come and would like to spend the weekend in glorious (cough* cough*) Pocatello, we will be in our new 4 bedroom house by then so you could stay with us! More on the house at a later date!
Once Upon A Time....
We didn't have internet in our house. Now we do, so there is no excuse for for the fact that our blog hasn't been updated in a very long time. I loved how a friend of mine updated her blog so I will copy her.
Top 10 Things That Have Happened Since Our Last Post.......
10. In June we found out that ISU decided to cancel the Paramedic program (the whole reason we moved to Poky) and we spent weeks trying to get a straight answer from anyone about what was actually going on and if/when they would bring the program back. (it isn't coming back...)
9. We were able to help Niki and Nik get engaged!!!!! We helped them find a great deal on a GORGEOUS ring and get him connected with dad so he could ask permission. Their wedding is November 20 in the Salt Lake Temple. Yay!
8.We got sod for our yard!!!! Now we have grass and it only took 3 hours!
7. Pike now weighs in at 60 pounds and is only 10 months old! We fear he may turn out to be a giant.....
6. All of my family was able to go up north to the Dworschak reservior in Orofino to play on the water. We had so much fun rying to teach Pike to swim. He didn't want any of that but liked the really shallow water. All of my little siblings a getting so big! It is starting to make me feel old.
5. My friend Brigette got her mission call and I was able to fly to Arizona to go through the temple with her! It was wonderful!
4. While I was in Arizona I got to spend a day with my brother Thor and we had SO MUCH FUN!
3. Our friend Kate who lost her husband in June has been able to stay with us most nights of the week now that she is going to school at ISU to help her avoid having to make the 30 min drive in from Downey everyday. We were even able to convert our office into a bedroom for her because we suspect that in the winter she will be spending even more time with us. It is great to have her, she loves to play with Pike when we don't have time.
2. Josh found a new degree program that he can graduate from in AUGUST. Fire Service Administration. Then on to a different school for Paramedic.
And finally....
I'm gonna be selfish and brag all about me on this one...
1. I audidioned for choir here at ISU and they were so impressed with my ability and knowledge and experience that they couldn't believe that I was not a music major! Compliments from choral directors are very few and far between so this was HUGE! I am singing in the women's choir this semester because it is all that fits into my schedule but it is AMAZING! Our director is just awesome and we have so much fun and are singing some of the coolest songs I have ever sung. I absolutly love it and am so excited to be singing again after years of only singing in church!
*Promise that things will get updated more often these days!!!!!
My AMAZING Husband-A year in recap
Check out those dimples! With a smile like that you know he has to be good for something but until we were married I didn't quite understand just what an unbelievable, multi-talented, hard working man Josh Scadden is. 
This is just one of the many bouquets that I have been privileged to receive in the last year.
As the fall semester drew to a close and the snow settled in, we decided we needed a Christmas Tree. Now, being from the desert that is Arizona, the idea of trekking through two feet of snow to find a tree small enough to fit in our basement apartment that was not totally scraggly did not sound appealing in the least, but that is what Josh thought needed to happen. So he decked me out in new snow boots, gloves and hat and hiked through the snow as I hung out down by the car watching, laughing and taking pictures.
Finally we did find one that would work though and Josh chopped it and hauled it down the hill to the Jeep. Once we got it home he set to the task of getting it to stand so that we could decorate it. (You see the tree trunk only had the diameter of about a quarter-the tree was only 4 ft tall- and they don't make tree stands that little. ) We had some improvising to do.
In the end it turned out a very cute, sad, little tree that tipped whenever it got the chance-but what can you say, we had a lot of fun!Shortly after Christmas was when all the real fun began. We were gearing up for the new semester and a test with the Pocatello Fire Department AND THEN found out our landlords were moving and selling our house so we had to find a new place to live. Who was awesome enough to go out in the middle of an awful week long snowstorm to inspect homes that had not been lived in for months that were surrounded by ridiculous amounts of snow, once again, Josh- I was tucked away in my cozy little office all day.
I wouldn't feel too bad for him though, he made some time to relax and do things he enjoyed.....
like buy me a new car! We were hypothetically looking around car lots one night and I happened to mention that this little Sunfire was cute. The next day after work I was at the bank and the dealership signing forms and driving off in my very own cute little car! What a way to bring in the new year!
Now of course the fact the we had to find a new home also meant that my clock did too...
Yeah I really do have a clock almost as big as Josh and that is him hanging it in our second home in 9 months. What a trooper.Another little gift that came along with the new home complete with yard, the new semester and the new work schedule that keeps Josh out all night and leaves me home alone was the first addition to our little family-Pike
I know Josh has already written about him but he is kind of a big deal and needed to be included. The last few months have been quite the adventure with this little (not so little anymore) guy. But I wouldn't trade him for anything.
Moving on....
In the few months that we have had our new car, we have managed to tack on quite a few miles- a few trips to Utah then Boise, my whirlwind non-stop road trip with Thor and Niki to get my mom and bring her to my dad's POST graduation in Boise, constant trips to Idaho Falls, and another trip up north to my sisters baptism-we decided that a little car with great gas mileage was definitely one intelligent purchase.
That truck driving job gave him a lot of practice at LOOOOONG, LATE driving. That came in handy but I don't think anything could have prepared him for that drive with the dog in the backseat next to Niki who was still awake and telling stories at 3am (if any of you have seen my sister when she is sleepy, you understand)
When the big day arrived, Josh volunteered to help out with so much.....
Including taking the lady of the hour out in the new car for ice cream! (don't worry, there is a lot of trunk space)
As the year progressed, a funny little thing happened one day...
and the subsequent adjusting and rehanging of the 3ft clock!The most recent project that has dropped into our lives was the making of my first wedding cake. A favor for Josh's little sister. I'm sure you can't imagine how Josh possibly could have helped me make a wedding cake but he has his ways.
Most wedding cakes these days have the bulk made from styrofoam. Now as poor starving college students, we were not about to shell out the $60 it was going to cost to buy styrofoam from the only store in town that had it, so Josh came up with a plan.
Well it worked out, but that ended up being a TON of cardboard circles that Josh traced, cut, glued and then sanded down smooth so that I could have a perfect base for this cake. I am pretty sure that if you ever need to know how many layers of cardboard it takes to get to one inch, my man has got your answer. 
My first (and let me just add LAST) attempt at a wedding cake.
While all of this was going on, Josh also was taking 17 credits and an EMT class that is worth 4 at UI but nothing here. He is now an Idaho State Certified EMT, he finished out the semester with b's and c's, managed to land a second job for the summer at Home Depot, put a pond with a waterfall in our yard, fix his motorcycle, train the puppy, and be unbelievably supportive of a wife struggling with depression.
In short, this has been a crazy year that there is no way I could have survived without the constant support and love of my wonderful husband. I have never met a man like him and am privileged to be called his wife.
Way to go Ferocious -Josh-
So yesterday I was watching Pike out the front window as he sat watching me in the front window when the electric company meter-man walked through the gate to read the meters on the house in front of us. (He does it from our front yard.) Pike watched him while I watched Pike to see what he would do. Pike looked about as interested in the guy as he is interested in the door mat he was sitting on. Not even a bark. Just kinda watched him go about his business. I guess we can just hope he is a little meaner to actual threats like the gas-man. On another note we found him a new friend who lives around the corner. A little boxer girl who belongs to a nice couple. Pike hasn't met the other dog yet but we hope it goes well.
Pike
So sorry to those who have seen or facebook or heard about Pike but he has taken so much of our time that we haven't had a chance to tell you all about him.So just over a week ago, while Morgan was in Boise watching her dad graduate from POST Josh was up to something. Friday morning he skipped class and went to Downey to look at a puppy to help Morgan feel safer and calmer while he was out at work untill late at night. Pike as we have come to call him was the last one of the litter to go and with a great price and papers we could not pass him up.
Pike was born on Dec. 8 2008. His father was a large (REALLY FRIGGIN BIG) fawn boxer like he is and his mothe was a dark brindle boxer. Both were great dogs. Pike was just shy of 10 pounds when we picked him up from the breeder and has in the last week put on another 5 pounds which makes him roughly 5 times bigger than the only other dog in the family, Stanley who is Josh's older sister's 3 pound chihuahua. (They haven't met.) So far he is healthy and loving life in his new home. We have taken him to see Josh's family in Idaho Falls and as long as we can keep him out of their cat's or Stanley's food he is a good dog there too. He is almost fully house trained and his only problems are when we leave him for extended periods of time so it probably is simply down to him just not being able to hold it any more.
Pike found out what a cat was for the first time Saturday evening when he met Spaz, Josh's parents' cat. Josh was watching Pike getting closer and closer to the cat sniffing out the situation all the time looking back at Josh periodically with a look that seemed to say what the crap happened to that dog? ITS UGLY! Josh warned Pike to keep his distance which he did while Josh was watching. A few minutes later while no one was watching we all heard a whap followed by Pike's claws trying to gain traction on the tile while he ran away whimpering. Needless to say the cat stood its ground.
Pike's favorite trick is to get us stuck anywhere we take him. Everyone who sees him thinks he is the cutest thing and HAS to pet him for a minute. PETCO and PETSMART trips are planned out in our day to take atleast a while if he is with us.
Pike is in our opinion a great dog and will be great for us. He is smart and looks great.
